The Joke Is On You (Open)

[``helena evelyn berkeley]

Helena wasn't afraid of getting caught by the Prefects. She had a way of persuading people, even if it was more likely the men that she could twirl in her fingers. Most girls didn't like her very much for most boys around her couldn't look at any other female. But, she hated that about herself. She wished she wasn't half-veela. She wished she wasn't pure-blood. Most of all, though, she wished she didn't have the Dark Mark on her left arm. It had been a requirement from her parents to become a Death Eater, and she had done it. Deep beneath her usually cruel countenance, Helena was as golden-hearted as they go. But, she couldn't show any one that. If she stay cold and mean to everyone she would be safe. Besides, she didn't want people to see the monster she kept locked up inside of her so deep. The veela part of her that she wanted to destroy. Sometimes, it came out just to get to her. Usually, just when a boy was around. It begged her to use her nature to get them to do whatever she wanted, but she hated it. She hated using it unless it was to get herself out of trouble. If she was really interested in any sort of man, she wouldn't use her veela instincts at all. But, sadly, she was stuck with them, for better or worse.

Angrily, she sat up in her bed in the girl's dormitories. She knew she wouldn't be able to sleep tonight but she had tried anyway. Sometimes she wondered why she even bothered. She couldn't remember the last time she had had a good night's sleep. But, she had managed in all of her years here at Hogwarts. She was one of the top students, for she always did her work. It might have been because she didn't have many friends. She spoke to the other Death Eaters that were around, but not for long. She preferred staying away from people, especially the likes of them. The only one she could stand was Regulus Black, and even he was a stretch. After all, he was of the male persuasion and she didn't have very much luck talking to them. Sighing as she swung her legs over the side, gazing down at her caramel skin with a sort of disgusted expression. Growling softly, she stood, stretching gently and then walked over to the mirror next to her canopy bed. Her face looked so forlorn, despite its rather exotic beauty. She splashed cold water on her face and then wiped it dry. Glancing into her emerald eyes again, she sighed, a little disappointed. She wanted her face to change. But, she knew it wouldn't. She'd always be this creature, this monster that would never be completely normal. For the wizarding world anyway.

Moving over to her trunk, she grabbed one of her pairs of jeans that she had to keep hidden from her parents. Her mother hated anything that resembled muggle clothing, but Helena always liked denim. Slipping the skinny black jeans on, Helena pulled off her night shirt, which was all she used to sleep in and then grabbed a low cut black long-sleeved shirt. It revealed her slim waist all the way around, but she didn't care. It only added to her sex appeal. Fanning out her long midnight hair, she felt the waves tumble down her back and then became still. Tucking her wand in her back pocket, she swiftly shut her trunk and then walked out of her dormitory. Upon arriving in the Common Room, she made sure no one was in it before she darted in the direction of the Portrait Hole. Pushing it open, she slipped out into the corridor and darted up the stairs to the main floor, hiding behind Suits of Armor whenever she heard a prefect's footsteps. Surprisingly, she got through the main staircase with ease, with help from all of the secret passageways she knew that led higher up in the school.

Finally, she arrived at the North Tower. Without expression, she pushed open the big doors and stepped out into the rather chilly air. It was December, after all. Moving towards the turret after shutting the door softly, she gazed down at the grounds below, her emerald eyes filled with sorrow. She would never be able to escape this hell she had put herself in. She should have been courageous enough to step outside of her parents wishes and go her own way. She wanted to be a Healer, but she couldn't be one because of her Death Eater tattoo. It would never disappear, either. With a sad little sigh, she watched as her breath turned into the air a very light fog. But, she didn't feel the cold. For a long time, she had become numb to the chill of anything. She had learned to become this way so as not to betray herself. She would do anything to stay on the Death Eaters' side, the Dark Lord's side, when her heart was pulling away from her, going towards a path that she desired with everything she had. But, it didn't show. She would always remain the little puppet-doll that her parents wanted her to be.

"Oh, what have I done?"

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[``kacie marie helms]

Kacie chuckled as she strolled through the corridors with - what was his name again? - Diggory? Dippet? She shook her head, deciding that it would be best to just agree on one thing: his last name started with a D. She grinned impishly at him, her hand grabbing his as she opened a nearby broom closet. She didn't need to worry about any of the other prefects coming to find her. She was the only one patrolling this floor, and the towers, of course. She needed a distraction tonight, something to get her mind off of all of the problems she had been dealt with lately. She was glad that whats-his-name was a Hufflepuff. She would have hated it if he had been a Slytherin, wouldn't have even bothered talking to him if that had been the case. She pushed the Seventh Year against a nearby wall, pressing her lips against his fiercely. He let out a low moan, pulling her closer, his hands entangling themselves in her hair, one slowly traveling down her body. She ran her fingers through his hair, a smirk gracing her features. Her lips trailed down to his neck, stopping short as his hands moved to the front of her jeans. She chuckled, pulling away from him. "Woah, slow down, lover boy," she scolded lightly. She straightened her clothes, ignoring the disappointed look on D's face when she exited the broom closet. "Let's try this again sometime," she smiled, leaving the boy confused and sexually frustrated on the seventh floor.

She laughed a bark of a laugh as she recalled the look on the bloke's face. Then, suddenly, the smile disappeared, a new face filling her mind.

She sighed as she remembered her encounter with Sirius Black. He had left her so confused, angry and unsure of herself when they had parted their ways that night at the lake. She had told him so much, and in turn, had learned many things about him, as well. She had kept an eye on Regulus since the incident, and took note of how he was coping, of how he was behaving. The next time she saw Sirius - if there was a next time - she would tell him how he was doing. She wouldn't try to persist him anymore on the subject of his brother, but she felt he would appreciate it if she kept him updated.

Kacie strolled through the corridors of the seventh floor, climbing up the towers to break up the hook-ups and take points from houses as she did so. Sighing, she looked at the staircase that led up to the North Tower, glad that this would be the last thing to check before she went to bed. She was growing exhausted, and was ready to fall asleep. She climbed the staircase lazily, pushing open the doors without hesitation. It was cool, the fall air bitter in its impatience for the arrival of Winter. Helena Berkeley, an aquaintance of sorts, stood there, staring out at the grounds below. She seemed to be contemplating something, and just when Kacie was about to ask, the girl's sad, hopeless voice filled the air.

"Oh, what have I done?" Helena groaned. She stared at the girl for a moment, considering the possibilities. Was it possible that...? "What have you done, Helena?" She found herself asking, stepping into the room. She took in the sight of the distraught girl. She couldn't have been recruited already...could she have? If she had, that's something that she needed to tell Dumbledore. Immediately. They couldn't tolerate Death Eaters at Hogwarts.

[``james ignotus potter]

James wandered aimlessly through the halls of Hogwarts for about the billionth time that year. All the guys were out doing other stuff, or so thats what they had told him. He didnt know about Remus as much, but he knew Sirius had probably went somewhere, probably in an empty classroom or closet, and was snogging some girl late at night. Prongs couldn't help but smile as he thought of that. That was how he had used to be, before he fell for a certain red haired Gryffindor.

LIly Evans. That's all James had had his mind set on for the past year. He had done well in his classes, and had even managed to become Head Boy, all to impress Lily. Then finally one night it had all paid off. They had met down in the kitchen, and had ended up telling each other how they felt, and then they had kissed. He hadn't seen Lily since then. This thought caused a frown to mar his handsome features. Maybe she had just been too busy? He shrugged to himself, not really wanting to think about it at that point.

He decided that before he headed to the Gryffindor Common Room, he'd better run up to the towers and check them out. He had to "perform his duties" as McGonagall had said. He shook his head and headed up the stairs, running a hand through his hair. He hated being Head Boy, but at the same time, he liked being able to roam the castle like this at late hours, and get away with it. When he came to the landing he saw a couple of girls there talking.

Upon further investigation he found that they were Slytherins, which made him smirk. Here was a great chance for him to help Gryffindor in the points race. He c ould tell one of them was a prefect, and he figured that that must be Kacie Helms. He had never really met her, so he didnt know much about her. He looked at the other girl and could not place her at all, for he had never met her before either. He finally cleared his throat and said in a friendly voice, "Shouldnt you ladies be in the common rooms now?"

[``helena evelyn berkeley]

Without turning, Helena knew who it was. Because she was so silent, she found herself observing more people and their movements probably in a way most wouldn't. She was most ardent in seeing everything about someone without even looking at them. With a simple footstep, she knew that it was Kacie Helms. She had a distinct smell to her as well, Helena thought. She smelled of sweet perfume, but there was an odd animal-like quality to her scent that had Helena thoughtful. The voice of her fellow Slytherin speaking only confirmed that she had been right. With no smile, she turned, facing Kacie with an expression resembling a statue. Her emeralds bored into the other girl's green and she whispered, "Nothing of concern to you, I can be quite certain." Her gaze was quite unrelenting as she stood there and she wondered if it did concern the girl in front of her. There were fears from other Slytherins that she wasn't really one of them, but Helena wasn't either, was she? She hated herself for being such a fool, for following paths that she wanted no part in. She knew of Kacie's meeting with Sirius Black that fateful evening, for she had been nearby during the time. She told no one about it, however, for it didn't really matter. She merely thought it intriguing. She'd heard what both of them had said to each other up until they both ran off, away from where she lay, behind bushes very near to them. But, she had no reason to use these things against the girl. Not unless provoked.

But, she knew she would never betray herself to anyone, least of all Kacie Helms. The girl reeked of something that Helena was jealous of. It was a courage of sorts that the half-veela would never achieve. She knew that she wasn't going to be able to move out of her parents' wishes and she hated herself for it. She despised herself every day, and this girl had no idea. Her expression remained stoic as she muttered, "Did you come out here for a particular reason or do you wish to give me a detention? If the first, I would be happy to leave your company. However, if it is the second, I can assure I will not mind at all. Detentions do not bother me. I have had many because I stay out so late. But, sleep has always chosen to escape me." She turned her gaze away, moving her body so that her back was towards the girl. She gripped the side of the turret, wishing to fling herself from it, but knowing that she would never be able to do such a thing. She was such a coward.

Upon hearing the second set of footsteps, Helena was unsure of who it was. She closed her eyes in thought, breathing in a scent that smelled quite intoxicating. Opening her eyes, she spun around, only to be met with the dark brown eyes of James Potter. She should have guessed it was one of the Marauders, but she figured. She had a feeling it would be one of them. She filed his voice in the back of her mind, cataloging his footsteps and face along with it. Giving him a very faint smile, she said, "Yes, we should, but I find it hard to sleep during these formidable days." She looked down to peel a piece of fuzz off of her black shirt. When she looked back up, she shook her hair out of her face, eying the both of them with no expression except the faint grin upon her caramel skin. "Wouldn't you agree?" Her emeralds flashed to James again and she stared at him quite searchingly. She'd never met him in person before, so she found this experience to be quite interesting. She wanted to know everything about him.

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[``kacie marie helms]

With no smile, Helena turned, facing Kacie with an expression resembling a statue. Her emeralds bored into the other girl's green and she whispered, "Nothing of concern to you, I can be quite certain." Her gaze was quite unrelenting as she stood there. Kacie sighed at the fellow Slytherin that stood before her. "Are you sure? If you're in trouble, I can help," she said. She knew the girl a bit. Knew her enough to know that she was like Regulus Black, unsure of where she stood, pureblood parents pushing her in the direction of the Dark Lord. If it came down to the girl needing help of that sort, she would be glad to help. It was hard enough to keep her secret, and she knew that the Slytherins were growing more and more suspicious of her by the second, but they had no proof, really. And they would never have any proof unless Sirius Black decided to break his promise.

She couldn't help but wonder why the bloody hell she had broken her own vow to tell the Marauder her secret. It was the most ridiculous, reckless thing she had ever done, but the strange thing was, she did not regret it. She was actually glad that she had told someone other than her family. It was relieving to tell someone what side she was on, that she longed to bring an end to the reign of Voldemort. He seemed to share the same ideas as her, so she was safe. For now. Helena's expression remained stoic as she muttered, "Did you come out here for a particular reason or do you wish to give me a detention? If the first, I would be happy to leave your company. However, if it is the second, I can assure I will not mind at all. Detentions do not bother me. I have had many because I stay out so late. But, sleep has always chosen to escape me." Kacie shrugged. "I was patrolling. This is my last stop before I head on to bed. But if you want, I'll leave you to your thoughts. I can tell when someone needs time to think." She said. Helena turned her gaze away, moving her body so that her back was towards her. She gripped the side of the turret, and Kacie suppressed a sigh at the sight. Yes, the girl was suffering from some sort of inner-turmoil. She almost turned around and left, leaving the girl to her thoughts. Sometimes, the best way to help a person was to let them figure it out on their own.

Upon hearing the second set of footsteps, Kacie turned her gaze to the doorway, unsure as to who would be traveling up the staircase at this time of night. She was the only Prefect patrolling the Seventh Floor and Towers. Opening her eyes, Helena spun around, the two Slytherins coming face-to-face with none other than James Potter, the Head Boy. She almost scoffed. Of course it would be one of the Marauders that she ran into. She shook her head in amazement, wondering when the bloody hell all the strange encounters would end. First Sirius, then Remus Lupin, now Potter? Who was next, Pettigrew? That rat was a bloody traitor in the midst of heros, in her opinion. Something about the mousy Marauder threw her off guard, made her uneasy, and she always followed her gut. The boy finally cleared his throat and said in a friendly voice, "Shouldnt you ladies be in the common rooms now?" Just as Kacie was about to reply, Helena gave him a very faint smile, and said, "Yes, we should, but I find it hard to sleep during these formidable days." She looked down to peel a piece of fuzz off of her black shirt. Kacie raised an eyebrow at Potter. "Patrolling," she replied, "What're you doing up here for, anyway? This is my route for the evening." She demanded. She couldn't help but feel a bit irate when it came to the subject of Potter. She could remember several occasions in which she had fallen victim to his constant pranks and hexes. She had been sure to get him back, to be sure, but four mischevious minds against one didn't always favor her. When Helena looked back up, she shook her hair out of her face, eying the both of them with no expression except the faint grin upon her caramel skin. "Wouldn't you agree?" Her emeralds flashed to James again and she stared at him quite searchingly. Kacie shook her head in disagreement, now eager to leave the tower. She didn't want to stay here and converse with James Potter. He was, by far, her least favorite person, next to Pettigrew, of course.

[``james ignotus potter]

James ran a hand through his black hair as he watched the girls for a second. He probably wasn't gong to do anything to them. One of them, Kacie, had reason to be up here. She was a prefect, and if James had to guess, she was probably patrolling or something like that. The other girl though, James could take points off of. He sighed, hating making that kind of call. He was sure Kacie would have done it already, but hell, they were both Slytherins. Then again, he hadnt actually ever given anyone a detention, or taken points before, and he knew that mostly everyone in the school knew it. He didnt take this seriously most of the time, unless something bad was actually going on. He had just gotten Head Boy because of Lily, but it seemed that it still didnt matter to her.

He heard the one girl talking, and looked at her, trying to think if he knew her or not. She seemed friendly though, for a Slytherin anyway. He thought about something to say, but then froze. Why was she being so nice? He was a Gryffindor, and usually Gryffindors and Slytherins didn't get along. Was she trying to get him to not take points off or something? He smirked, still not knowing what to say. He told himself to get over it, and say something, or else they would think that he wasn't being serious. He nodded and said, "Yah I guess I could agree..." He looked at her again and then said, "The name's James Potter by the way...I dont believe we've ever met..." Sometimes he liked to be nice to people, and not play pranks on them.

He heard Kacie's voice and frowned slightly. Great, this was not what he needed. He knew the girl didnt like him, or any of the other Mauderers for that matter. She seemed to dislike him the most though. James had to admit that he probably deserved it though, after all the pranks he had played on her. Actually, it hadn't been that many, or at least he didnt think. Besides, hadn't she been satisfied when she had gotten him back a time or two? He decided to think about it later and turned to her and said in his trademark sarcastic voice, "Geeze Helms, you could have asked what I was doing a little nicer..."

He wished that he could get along with Kacie. She seemed like an alright person, but James didnt want to judge her from only meeting her once or twice. He had to admit though, he hated the way she acted around him, but once again, he couldn't blame her for it. He sighed and said, "I was just doing my duties Helms..I know this was your stop, but McGonagall told me that I have to take my duties more seriously, so here I am..."

[``helena evelyn berkeley]

Helena's melancholy emeralds narrowed ever so slightly and she stared at Kacie with an unreadable expression. Softly, she whispered, "Thank you for your concern, but I need no help." She nodded, trying to convey to the girl to drop the subject. For a moment, her eyes flashed quite dangerously but she kept the pleasant smile on her face for a single instant, until all expression faded. For a moment, she tilted her head to the side, her black waves falling around her face. With elegance, she whispered, "How am I to trust someone that is being treated so brutally by all the other Slytherins?" She eyed her and then stood up straight again. The other Slytherins were distrusting of her, so why should Helena trust her? Because she knew Kacie was what she wanted to be. But, she couldn't let the girl know. She wanted to scream. She wanted to ask for Kacie's help and friendship. She wanted to be out of this mess and protected by someone that had the same morals as her. But, she had no choice. She had dug herself into a hole and she was paying the consequences quite brutally. Her face remained expressionless, her eyes like stone. She wanted to say everything to this girl that was like her in thoughts, but she couldn't. She couldn't say anything and it was slowly eating away at her inside. She was trapped, damn it! As she faced away from Kacie, she whispered quite softly, "I would prefer it if you stayed, but if you wish to go to bed, then it is fine." Her tone was monotonous, as usual, but she didn't look back at the girl. Her knuckles whitened at the pressure she was causing them as she gripped onto the stone turrets in front of her.

Noticing the scoff Kacie threw at James, Helena narrowed her eyes very slightly again. It was quite obvious the girl didn't like him much, but not many Slytherins were supposed to like a Gryffindor. She threw a hypocritical glance at Kacie, but then her eyes flashed back to James. Hearing the cruelty in Kacie's voice when she spoke to James, she blinked three times quite rapidly. The girl's coldness was surprising, but Helena had been known for such on many occasions, despite her smiles that told everyone that all was peachy. She watched Kacie shake her head, and she was surprised. But, it didn't show. How could Kacie not find it hard to sleep when she was one of the most mistrusted students in her own house? All of the Slytherins figured her to be a traitor. And, even Helena knew her to be a Muggleborn. But, it didn't bother her, really. She thought it extremely impressive that the girl had kept that a secret. Hearing James speak to her again, she flashed him another well-practiced smile and moved forward before sticking out her hand. "Helena Berkeley. I can assure you that it is a pleasure." Many years of her parents holding parties with the highest Pure-blood families taught her to say this to everyone she met. She was well-prepared for everything that had to do with unnecessary niceties.

The raven-haired girl noticed his surprise at Kacie. So, she wasn't alone in that thought. She raised an elegantly poised eyebrow at the both of them, proceeding to lean against the turret nonchalantly. Her midriff was revealed more, but she didn't seem to notice. She listened to him reply to her, moving her elbows to rest onto the stone behind her. One leg moved upwards and her foot rested against the wall behind her. She looked like the epitome of ease and relaxation, her face set in an emotionless, but calm expression. Yet, inside she was screaming. She was desperate to be let free and yearned to be just like Kacie. She wished she hadn't been put into Slytherin, either. If it had been her choice, it would have been Ravenclaw, but she didn't have a choice. She was simply a perfect little puppet, destined to follow the rules of her maniacal parents. But, when would the madness end? Probably never. She was trapped, unable to get out. But, she would never reveal such insecurity and fear to these people. She was the perfect daughter. A little monotonous, sure, but most people didn't notice that. Most didn't care. And she hated them all for it.

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[``kacie marie helms]

Helena's melancholy emeralds narrowed ever so slightly and she stared at Kacie with an unreadable expression. Softly, she whispered, "Thank you for your concern, but I need no help." She nodded, an obvious attempt to get Kacie to drop the subject. "Whatever you say," she replied in a bored, monotonous tone. For a moment, Helena's eyes flashed quite dangerously, but she kept the pleasant smile on her face for a single instant, until all expression faded. For a moment, she tilted her head to the side, her black waves falling around her face. With elegance, she whispered, "How am I to trust someone that is being treated so brutally by all the other Slytherins?" She eyed her and then stood up straight again. Kacie sighed. She knew the other Slytherins were suspicious of her; it was old news. Tilting her head to the side, she sighed exasperatedly. "Just because I don't boast my loyalty about doesn't mean I'm anyone's enemy. I just know how to keep a low profile. It's easy to dodge suspicion among the professors if you just...pretend," a soft smile played on Kacie's lips, and she knew she was lying through her teeth, but it was necessary. All of the Slytehrins had been treating her oddly lately. They were onto her. She had informed Dumbledore of this news, and he advised her to keep from meeting him, giving weekly reports on the house activities. He said that if he needed any new information, he would call on her. For now, however, she was to play the part of a Slytherin. She wasn't going to boast her loyalties to the entire school, no. She was going to play the part of the quiet, loyal subject. She was playing the part of a future Death Eater too smart to gain suspicion by the time she graduated Hogwarts. Helena's face remained expressionless, her eyes like stone. Kacie had her own suspicions of the girl, but she did not allow that to show. Her expression was monotonous, void of all emotion, excluding boredom. As she faced away from Kacie, she whispered quite softly, "I would prefer it if you stayed, but if you wish to go to bed, then it is fine." The sixth year Slytherin nodded in reply. The girl's tone was monotonous, as usual, but she didn't look back at Kacie. Her knuckles whitened at the pressure she was causing them as she gripped onto the stone turrets in front of her. She had a feeling that the girl was going through much more trouble than she let on. Kacie idly wondered if she was one of the trapped, like Regulus, forced into the clan of the Death Eaters by parental influence, not from pure choice.

Noticing the scoff Kacie threw at James, Helena narrowed her eyes very slightly again. Hearing the cruelty in Kacie's voice when she spoke to James, she blinked three times quite rapidly, but she didn't care. She wanted to know the reasons behind Potter's arrival before she hexed him. She had dealt with far too much this week alone, and having the chance to hex the Head Boy into next week was growing more and more appealing by the second. She didn't fully understand her reasons for disliking Potter so much, only one reason seemed to enter her mind, however: jealousy. Potter had everything that she didn't. Friends, a House he was welcomed in...Sirius. The thought of Potter being able to joke around with Sirius, being able to talk and laugh and enjoy his company in the open, without worrying about other's opinions and suspicions... It infuriated her. She was angry, bitter, and jealous, though she would never admit it. Hearing James speak to her again, Helena flashed him another well-practiced smile and moved forward before sticking out her hand. "Helena Berkeley. I can assure you that it is a pleasure." Kacie resisted the urge to roll her eyes at the comment, and settled on crossing her arms over her chest, tapping her foot impatiently at the Gryffindor.

James seemed to hear Kacie's voice and frowned slightly. She sneered in reply. The bloody git needed to leave. Now. This was her patrol area, and the bloke didn't seem to realize how close he was coming to a Bat Bogey hex. He turned to her and said in his trademark sarcastic voice, "Geeze Helms, you could have asked what I was doing a little nicer..." She smiled a false-sweet smile, and replied with just as much sarcasm, "Fine. What the bloody hell are you doing on my patrol, Potter? Hoping to find Evans up here? So sorry to disappoint you, but she's patrolling the grounds tonight." He sighed and said, "I was just doing my duties Helms..I know this was your stop, but McGonagall told me that I have to take my duties more seriously, so here I am..." Kacie rolled her eyes at the bloke, leaning against the wall casually, one foot touching the ground, the other bent at the knee against the wall. She kept her arms crossed, and sighed exasperatedly. She did not bother to reply to Potter's statement, simply turned her head away from him, and gazed out the window, into the dark, cold, ominous night.

[``james ignotus potter]

James looked at both of the girls again, wondering what was going on. He sensed that there was a little tension. Had he come up here in the middle of something? He guessed they had been talking about something, but he didn't know what, and he was sure he didn't want to know, so he didn't bother asking. He finally shrugged to himself, telling himself that it wouldn't be the first time that had happened. Being with his friend Sirius, often resulted in interrupting things. The pranks they played, and everything else tended to interrupt things that people were doing, but they didn't care. All they cared about was having fun.

He heard Helena's voice and smiled softly and said, "I haven't seen you around before, but your a seventh year right?" She seemed to be older, like James, so he had just assumed she was in the last one or two years of school. Hopefully, his assumption wouldn't be wrong. He didn't need to make another enemy tonight. He looked at Helena again and decided that she didn't seem all that bad. Then again, neither did Kacie. Helena was nice to him, which told him that she didn't care about what house he was in, which was a slight relief. Sometimes, he hated the interhouse rivalry, but he also knew that it had been going on since before he had come to Hogwarts, and he also knew there was nothing he could do to stop it. He just kind of had to deal with it.

He heard Kacie's voice again and sighed softly. When was she going to start laying off of him? He had yet to figure out exactly why she seemed to hate him. He had pulled a prank on her a while ago, so what? It hadn't been anything personal. They pulled pranks on nearly everyone. They would probably try and pull pranks on some of the professors if they had the chance to. They were all smarter than that though. They knew that if they pulled a prank on a professor, that they might get expelled. That thought kept them in line, most of the time anyway,

James finally registered what Kacie had said and ran a hand through his hair, out of habit. Ok, so she seemed to be even more annoyed with him then usual, just great. He looked at her again and said, "Come on Helms, that was a low blow..and no..I wasn't expecting to find her up here.." He didn't know what else to say. She had brought the one thing into the conversation that James didn't feel like talking about, and that was Lily.

[``helena evelyn berkeley]

Helena didn't really like Kacie's expressionless tone. It made her infinitely more sorrowful, but what was she to do? She didn't know how to converse with other people. It wasn't exactly one of her strong points. But, the fact that Kacie had no real enthusiasm for being around her just shot more of her hopes down into the darkness, making them tumble over the side of the turret and collapse onto the chilly grounds below. Nodding at Kacie's words, she gave another smile before whispering, "You are braver than you realize, I think." Her eyes softened for a fraction of a second before clouding over like emotionless stone. She stared at Kacie with her statue-green eyes, the emerald quite like pale jade rock. In this moment, they weren't very outstanding. But, she'd never considered herself to be anything of the sort. She was simply half of a monster stuck inside a body that couldn't do what it wanted. For some reason, Helena knew that Kacie was lying. It was something about her voice when she spoke. Sure, it was even and clearly articulated, but then again . . . Did anyone tell the truth? Noticing the bored expression on Kacie's face again, Helena sighed. With a rather stern gaze, she muttered, "You do not have to pretend around me, Kacie. I do not mind being alone. If you truly wish to leave, I shall not stop you." But, she hadn't minded the momentary company. It was quite relieving, in a way. Yet, what did it matter? Everyone she talked to had no interest in talking to her so why did she even try?

As Kacie reacted to James' appearance, Helena noticed the slight jealousy and disapproval. But, what did James have that she didn't? It didn't take long for Helena to figure it out. Sirius and a place where he could belong. The thing that Helena wanted from both of them was courage. She had no bravery when it came right down to it. She was not good for battle, for she merely knew the textbook definition of everything. She was no fighter. She eyed Kacie as she tapped her foot, noting the impatience, but she didn't show her curiosity. She saw the protectiveness of the girl's stance, as if she were trying to warn him not to prod at her whilst she was in such a mood. She was struck momentarily silent at the coldness to Kacie's voice. Sure, she had heard it many times but what had James done to deserve such behavior? Her pale green eyes continued to watch her fellow Slytherin, portraying none of her interest. They were simply blank orbs of nothingness, riddled with a slightly noticeable sorrow.

Turning back to James when he spoke to her, Helena nodded, her raven black hair falling softly around her face as she did so. Her schedule was probably a lot different from his. She took a lot of Advanced classes, some that may have seemed quite unnecessary, like Muggle Studies and Arithmancy. But, she was in a couple of his classes. She just made it quite impossible for herself to be noticed. She always sat in the back, hidden in the shadows. "I would not have expected you to have seen me around. I am not much of a talker, really." Her green eyes stared quite unrelentingly into his. Should she mention that she had Advanced Potions and Defense Against the Dark Arts with him? She momentarily looked away, figuring that she wouldn't bother. It didn't matter anyway. He wouldn't care. She watched him run his fingers through his hair once more, noting that it was one of his habits. She had seen him do it quite often and oddly, she found it quite amusing. When Kacie mentioned Lily Evans, Helena watched James closely, her emeralds staring straight into his. There was a deep affection for the Gryffindor deep in those brown eyes, and she knew that he pined for her quite desperately. Whenever she saw them talking, or him trying to apologize over something, he always had that sparkle in his eyes, no matter if she was berating him or not. She clenched her fists against the turret again, jealousy leaking into her heart. She knew that she would never find a man to love her like that. She was nothing but a coward trapped with a monster.

All she had was a sugar plum heart beating wildly in its cage.

[/size]

[``kacie marie helms]

Nodding at her words, Helena gave another smile before whispering, "You are braver than you realize, I think." Kacie could not help but stare at Helena curiously, wondering the meaning, the origin of the other Slytherin's words. "What do you mean?" She asked, struggling to keep her tone of voice expressionless, though it was obvious that even a dimwitted Hufflepuff would notice the curiosity and wariness as she spoke. Helena's eyes seemed to soften for a fraction of a second before clouding over like emotionless stone. She stared at Kacie with her statue-green eyes, the emerald quite like pale jade rock, and the Muggleborn could not help but wonder what was troubling the poor girl. Was she trapped in a situation like so many others? Afraid of what is to come, merely going down the path they chose simply because of parental instruction? She could not help but hope that this wasn't the case for Helena, but, then again, she knew nearly every Slytherin's business. She knew Helena was a pureblood, and it was obvious that her parents were probably forcing her into a position. From the simple flash of emotion in the girl's eyes, she knew. Helena sighed, and with a rather stern gaze, she muttered, "You do not have to pretend around me, Kacie. I do not mind being alone. If you truly wish to leave, I shall not stop you." Kacie repeated Helena's gesture, sighing exasperatedly. "It is not that I admire solitude, Berkeley, merely that I prefer the company of those with intelligence. Thankfully, it seems, I have stumbled upon it tonight," Kacie offered the girl a small, rare smile, reassuring her that her presence was not a burden. "How are you, anyway?" She couldn't help but ask. Maybe, if the girl was truly in trouble, she would take this as a chance to confide in her, though it was sure that her trust was not something to believe as true. If the girl turned out to be a Death Eater without a conscious, she would not hesitate to tell Dumbledore. Still, she felt that, if the girl was remorseful of her actions, there might still be hope for her yet. Dumbledore had recruited several Death Eaters in the past, convinced them to join the Order as spies, and so far, only one had been discovered.

He smiled as Helena spoke and said, "I haven't seen you around before, but your a seventh year right?" Kacie resisted the urge to roll her eyes at the comment. As if Potter actually cared about getting to know the girl or not. He was a cocky, arrogant git of a Gryffindor, and she was a Slytherin. As much as everyone liked to believe otherwise, the rivalry between the two houses would always be there. There was no such thing as blurring the lines between the two, no matter how much anyone wanted it to. Kacie partially thought all of this out of bitterness, knowing that Sirius was a wish that would never come true. They had had that encounter at the lake, sure, and the occasional letter, but she could help but doubt it. She still thought that it wouldn't last with him, as much as she wished it would. They may be the same, and he may know that she was a muggleborn spy merely placed in the wrong house in her first year, but the truth was still there. He was a Gryffindor, she a Slytherin, and nothing could change that. They could not make their growing relationship known to those around them, for it was dangerous for the both of them. He was a Seventh Year, anyway, and she a Sixth. A year apart, and that only seemed to change things between them more. Potter looked at Helena again and seemed to decide on something. Turning back to James when he spoke to her, Helena nodded, her raven black hair falling softly around her face as she did so. "I would not have expected you to have seen me around. I am not much of a talker, really." Helena said, her green eyes stared quite unrelentingly into his.

Potter. That word alone was enough to cause shivers of disgust and complete annoyance to travel through her veins. He was the most egotistical, rude boy she had ever met in her life. On several occasions, she had been a victim of his various pranks, though he had laid off quite a bit this year, though Kacie merely suspected that was due to Lily Evans, the Head Girl and Potter's love interest. In the past, however, she had been one among many Slytherins pranked on a weekly basis. She had every right to dislike Potter, though she knew he would not see it that way. Hell, he probably didn't even remember all of the pranks he'd pulled alongside the Marauders in the past. He'd most likely see her as another disrespectful Slytherin, a future Death Eater, and try to hex her some time or another. Potter seemed to finally register what she had said and ran a hand through his hair, probably out of idiotic habit. He looked at her again and said, "Come on Helms, that was a low blow..and no..I wasn't expecting to find her up here.." Kacie merely smirked coldly in reply. "I know," she said, "That's why I said it, you git."

[``james ignotus potter]

James studied Helena closely, finding himself wondering where he had seen her before. The more he looked at her, the more he seemed to think he knew her from somewhere. He racked his brain, trying to figure it out. Had he seen her in the Great Hall at meals? He dismissed that idea quickly. It was hard to notice anyone in the Great Hall, unless you were actually looking for them, especially if they were in a different house. He once again began to run places through his mind. He had probably passed her in the hallways a few times, but once again, it was hard to actually notice anyone unless you were looking for them with all the students going through the hallways on their way to class. He decided to leave it alone for right now, knowing that he would probably figure it out sooner or later, when he was least expecting it.

He heard her voice again and smiled softly. She was the complete opposite of him then. He and Sirius could talk for hours, about nothing really, and have fun with it. When he was by himself, James was actually pretty good at holding conversations...usually. This night right here seemed to be the exception. Why couldn't he find anything to say? He didn't have to be charming or anything like that. It wasn't like he was trying to get Helena to go out with him or anything, it was just a casual conversation. Was it maybe because Kacie was here? He once agian had to let it drop, not wanting to think about it right now.

All of a sudden, a thought crossed his mind, and he knew exactly where he had seen Helena before. He remembered sitting in Defense Against the Dark Arts class, not really talking to anyone, just kind of waiting for class to start. He remembered thinking that she looked so sad, and wondering why she wasn't talking to anyone, especially the people from her own house. Then again he also remembered her in another class, Advanced Potions. Once again she hadn't been interacting with the others all that much, but he remembered her at least talking to some of the other Slytherins, and if he remembered rigt, she had even answered a few of the professor's questions. He looked at her again and said, "We're in Defense Against the Dark Arts and Advanced Potions together aren't we?"

James turned back to Kacie, a slight look of hurt showing on his handsome features. Why did she have to bring Lily up? James was already on edge about Lily since that night in the kitchen, and having not seen her in a while was making him wondering if things would ever work out. He heard Kacie's voice and saw the cold smirk on her face. He shook his head slighty. He still could not understand why she seemed to hate him so much. He glanced at her, but had no comment this time. He frowned and then just said, "Whatever Helms..." He didn't want to talk anymore about Lily right now, it was to depressing.

[``helena evelyn berkeley]

When Kacie's curiosity spiked, Helena smiled again, this time with more softness. Her emeralds glowed gently, but she said nothing in reply. If she didn't know by now why and how she was braver than most, then Helena wasn't going to spoil her fun. Besides, the girl needed to find it out on her own. Then, as her expression turned stoic, the raven-haired girl noticed the pity leak into the other green eyes. She blinked rapidly before turning her gaze away. Not a word and nothing would be broken. She was not broken . . . She was not broken . . . Then, as her emeralds fluttered back to Kacie's, fear encroached upon Helena's insides, very close to complete consumption. She knows . . . But, she didn't let it show. Her entire life she'd been hiding from others. Another Slytherin girl, a younger mud-blood at that, wasn't going to crack her. Oh, how could she think such things? She had let her ears be privy to the words of those horrid Death Eaters. They were so unforgiving. Helena could never be like them. But, what was she to do? She was not brave. Not at all. Narrowing her eyes slightly at the near-insult, Helena's emeralds widened to their normal size as Kacie complimented her. Nodding once, she whispered, "How darling of you to suggest such a thing. I can assure you that it is well appreciated." She nodded, giving another smile. But, this time, it was sincerity that leaked through her lips, not just a pleasantry. A delicate frown creased her brow at the girl's question and she tilted her head to the side very slowly, wondering what could become of this inquiry. What could she say in reply to not raise alarm in Kacie's mind? Of course, Helena knew of her loyalties, rather she was jealous of them. Looking down at her hands for a moment, she murmured, "I will admit to you that times have been better." Her jaw clenched for a moment, sorrow leaking into every pore of her body. She seemed suddenly haggard with a burdening beauty she'd never be able to get rid of. "But, I doubt that anything will get better very soon. The happiness is growing scarce and the fear increases in rampant lengths." Her tone was rather pitiful, but she quickly turned and gazed down at the grounds below, taking a deep breath. It was times like these where she wished she had been born a different woman. Plastering a well-to-do smile on her face, she looked back at Kacie and murmured in her sweet voice, "How are you faring, Kacie? Far better than I am, I hope?" Her smile turned bitter.

Every time James spoke, Helena couldn't help but turn her gaze to Kacie just to see what the girl was thinking. Obviously, she thought very little of him. Then, she noticed a sort of sadness leak into the other girl's green eyes. She pondered for a moment, considering the possibilities. Usually when one thought of James, one thought of the other Marauders. It was a likely chain. So, Kacie was most assuredly thinking of Sirius. It was only natural. Without being able to stop herself, Helena gave her a comforting, knowing smile. But, then, realizing what she was doing, she quickly stifled it and cleared her throat. It was almost as if Kacie were acting upon her feelings towards James in the exact way Lily Evans did. It was intriguing and one could only assume that the other Slytherin might find him rather handsome. But, Helena knew better. She didn't assume things. She found them out with factual evidence. Then again, she never had anyone but herself to confide in so what did it give her in return to know all of these things? Simply satisfaction or something less than noble? She wasn't sure at the moment, but she didn't want to linger on it. She kept it in the back of her mind to possibly ask Kacie why she abhorred James so much later. Maybe when they were closer. If it wasn't the obvious fact that he was a known miscreant who had recently changed some of his ways, then Helena wouldn't bother. But, it seemed to be something more. Something even she didn't know about.

Helena felt a little uncomfortable under his scrutinizing gaze, but she knew that he was trying to place her face with somewhere he had been before. She had seen that many times when she had first met people. They never remembered her because she was always hiding herself. Usually, she liked to hide her face with her hair, but sometimes, she just kept her eyes on the ground. As was obvious, Helena wasn't the most confident of girls. It was funny, really, for a girl born with astounding beauty to feel this way about herself. But, when she looked in the mirror, she saw nothing but a mask, just like the one she would have to wear when she graduated. Pain tore through her body at the thought, agony searing through her heart. She couldn't do such a thing. She couldn't hurt all of those people for so horrid a cause. She had to find a way out. But, she had no options. Kacie seemed to be hinting at something, but Helena couldn't take a chance. Never. Blinking rapidly as James' voice filtered into her brain, emeralds locked onto those warm browns. She almost felt a sort of delight tickling against her heart at the fact that he had noticed her. But, she didn't let it show. Yet it was something about her eyes that suggested that she was extremely satisfied. She gave him a pleasant smile and whispered, "Yes, we have those classes together. I am quite shocked that you remember." Her eyes were smiling brightly. Choosing to ignore Kacie's rudeness for the moment, she continued to look at James. A sort of happiness seemed to ooze out of her for the minute, but it seemed too much for her. A sort of smug look enveloped her face then as she fought to keep the joy alight upon it. "Tell me, James, did you find the Draught of the Living Death as challenging as I did? I do like that sort of thing, but I feel like Professor Slughorn may have given it to us too early." Her tone was light, conversational, as if she had been friends with him for years. But, she did consider these two to be her friends, at least for right now. Hopefully, they wouldn't hurt her.

[/size]

[``kacie marie helms]

When Kacie's curiosity spiked, Helena smiled again, this time with more softness. Her emeralds glowed gently, but she said nothing in reply. Kacie didn't know what Helena meant by her statement, and when the girl didn't reply, she took it as a silent statement that she needed to figure that out on her own. From the strange feeling she experienced under the girl's gaze, her paranoia spiked. Did this girl know more about her than she should? Helena blinked rapidly before turning her gaze away, then, as her emeralds fluttered back to Kacie's, fear embedded itself into her gaze. A worried expression flitted across her face before she could stop it, and she asked the girl, very hesitantly. "Helena...everything's alright with you, isn't it? You can tell me if anything's going on," she said carefully, hoping that the girl understood that Kacie was there for her, should she need the help. Narrowing her eyes slightly at her earlier comment, Helena's emeralds widened to their normal size as Kacie complimented her. Nodding once, she whispered, "How darling of you to suggest such a thing. I can assure you that it is well appreciated." She nodded, giving another smile. But, this time, it was sincerity that leaked through her lips, not just a pleasantry. Kacie smirked impishly in reply to the girl's statement. "Well, I do try," she joked, and momentarilly turned her gaze to the window, staring out at the night sky curiously. She could not help but wonder how such a place was created, and how she was lucky enough to be a part of this world. The only downside to being a witch was being away from Thomas, and as the years went on, the harder it seemed to let him go. A delicate frown creased Helena's brow at the Sixth Year Slytherin's question and she tilted her head to the side very slowly, a strange expression appearing on the girl's face that Kacie could not decipher. Looking down at her hands for a moment, Berkeley murmured, "I will admit to you that times have been better." Her jaw clenched for a moment, sorrow leaking into every pore of her body. Kacie smiled sadly at the girl, wondering what could have happened to make the girl so sorrowful. Though she knew that Berkeley must be a future Death Eater, she was still human, she still had feelings and insucurities, just like the rest of humanity. "But, I doubt that anything will get better very soon. The happiness is growing scarce and the fear increases in rampant lengths." Her tone was rather pitiful, but the girl quickly turned and gazed down at the grounds below, taking a deep breath. Frowning, Kacie replied, "Happiness is only scare and fear increased when one does not allow themselves to see the good in the world. People call it naiveness, yet I cannot help but see it as hope. Happiness, strength, and courage are what's needed to defeat fear." "How are you faring, Kacie? Far better than I am, I hope?" Helena murmured, her smie taking on a bitter expression. Kacie offered the girl a small smile as she replied, "Better than normal. Then again, what is normal to me, anyway?"

Kacie could feel Helena's gaze on her back as James spoke to her, and couldn't help but find it a bit uncomfortable. She didn't always enjoy being so horrid to people, but there was just something about Potter that pushed her buttons at the mere thought of him. Giving a quick glance to Helena, she froze when she saw the comforting, knowing smile on the fellow Slytherin's face. Her eyes narrowed momentarilly at the girl, immediately suspicious. It was as if the girl knew something she shouldn't, and Kacie didn't like having that feeling about people, didn't like the idea of people knowing something about her that she did not wish to share. Suddenly, the girl quickly stifled her smile and cleared her throat. "Are you alright?" She asked the girl, knowing that Helena would probably put it off in some sort of nonchalant way. She made a mental note to find out what the girl was up to later. James turned back to Kacie, a slight look of hurt showing on his handsome features. Kacie sighed, turning her gaze away from the Marauder. Why did he have to make it his mission to make her feel horrible? A strange pang of regret erupted through her, and she struggled to keep her face composed in order to put off the look, though it still shined through her bright emerald eyes. The boy shook his head slighty, glancing at her for a moment before frowning. "Whatever Helms..." He said. Frowning, Kacie merely waltzed to the window of the tower, overlooking the school. In the distance, she could see the Giant Squid in the lake, swimming contentedly as a young couple relaxed nearby. She sighed mutely at the sight, remembering the encounter with Sirius. She had written him earlier that day, though she hadn't recieved a reply yet. She wasn't worried, as she was very much like him. She knew that he would be busy doing other things, laughing and joking about with his friends. She chewed on her lower lip a moment, contemplating something. Finally, she turned to face Potter. "Sorry, alright?" She said, a bit reluctantly. "Won't bring up your love life anymore. It's your business, anyway. That was a low blow...and I apologize."

[``james ignotus potter]

James smiled as he looked at Helena again. To him, she seemed slightly happier now. He didn't know what had made the difference, but whatever it was, he was glad. Maybe it had been him actually recognizing her? He shrugged it off. He usually knew everyone in his class, even if they didn't really talk to him, or he didn't talk to them. He kind of kept to himself in those kind of classes, where he didn't have Sirius and Remus with him. Sirius was actually in his Defense Against The Dark Arts class, but in Advanced Potions he had Evans, which didn't help him very much seeing as how she still wasn't really talking to him without them fighting, or fighting to not hex each other. James sighed at that fact. He shook his head, telling himself that he could sulk later. Right now he was still talking to someone. He smiled softly as he noticed the change in Helena's voice. Good, he had gotten her to open up a little bit and relax. She looked like the type of girl that just needed someone to talk to and be there for her, and not judge her. he thought for a second and nodded slowly and said, "Yah, I did find it a little challenging, but I somehow managed to get through it. I think Professor Slughorn was just trying to see if we could do it. I think he wanted to challenge us. After all, it is Advanced Potions, and I think we should probably expect things like that more often now.." He cringed at the thought. Sometimes he had enough problems in potions, he didn't need to be worrying about if they were going to be making a potion that was too advanced for them. Then he would have to squeak by, just like he had with the Draught of Living Death.

James was brought out his thoughts as he watched Kacie turn away from him. He sighed softly, wondering if she was ever going to get over this whole not liking him thing. Sure he was a prankster, but usually people didn't hate him, unless it was Lily of course. He frowned once again as he thought about Lily. He still was trying to get to her, but she was still refusing any attempt. He was beginning to think that maybe this wouldn't work out, or maybe it just wasn't meant to be. He hoped with every beat of his heart and breath that he took that it was just taking longer, and that eventually she would come around, but the longer this kept going on, the more James began to think that it might not work. His mind wandered back to the night in the Kitchens that they had kissed, and he briefly wondered if that meant something, or if that was just kind of a pity thing because she knew how much he liked her. He was brought back to the present as he heard Kacie talking to him. He looked at her, his eyes meeting hers for the briefest second, a surprised look on his face. She was actually apologizing to him? He sent her a thankful smile and said, "Thanks...apology accepted...."

He looked around again, wondering what else to say. He couldn't believe that Kacie had just apologized to him, but hey, it was a start in her not hating him right? He smiled softly to himself and decided not to worry about it right now. He had enough going on. He looked out the window and saw the moon and cringed. It was going to be a full moon soon. Great, now he'd have to deal with Moony on top of everything else. But hey, he didn't mind most of the time, that's what friends were for.